Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Managing the Chaos - Life with Three Toddlers

I am new to this whole parenting thing.

There are days when I feel like a total failure. Days when, at dinner time, I look in the fridge and declare it's "breakfast for dinner night" and we eat scrambled eggs and cereal. Days Weeks were I let the laundry pile up and I can't muster the strength to go through it all. Days when my patience is thin and nap-time seems far away.

I'm learning.

One thing I have learned from parenting is to let some things go. As a type-A personality, I want things immediately. It's all or nothing. I've come to realize that life with three toddlers, life post-adoption, does not always go as planned.

It's easy with three kids around the same age to group them as 1. I find myself lumping them together for some things. Let's all watch Elmo. Everyone takes a bath. Jammie time for everybody. You want a snack? Everyone gets a snack. I find, although, the more I lump them together in things the more I don't realize their differences. Sometimes, in the rush to get things done and accomplished, I forget to slow it all down and look at who they are becoming. Noticing their differences.

My youngest girl, for example, just started loving Sesame Street. She has a strong personality and she wants things her way all the time - which is hard, when you're the smallest. She hates getting her hair done but she loves dressing up. I just recently found out she loves painting.

My only boy loves to cuddle. He lugs around a pink bunny rabbit which is actually his sisters but he claimed it as his own. He won't sleep without it. If he is away from his twin sister for even a little bit, he will greet her with a big hug. He struggles with nap-time and bedtime. He loves to play cars but also loves to play with baby dolls.

My oldest girl loves to sing and dance. She recently is totally into Disney princesses. She has a sweet tooth like her mom and loves to spend time with her dad in the vegetable garden. She loves to point out airplanes in the sky and she sings at the top of her lungs in the car during the morning ride to the sitters.

In playing off of their individuality, I've realized that each one of them needs and deserves alone time with their mom and dad. It's not just an "adoption thing." Each one of them values and deserves alone time with mom and dad. It doesn't have to be an entire day, but small moments that let them know they are loved and valued as individuals. This probably comes as "old hat" to veteran parents, but for me, this was a recent revaluation.

So I'm trying to incorporate more alone time with each of them. Taking my son to the grocery store for a quick errand. Taking my daughter to a movie. Letting the oldest stay up an extra hour or two to watch a show on tv with me. Cuddling with one of them during their nap time. Letting one of them work in the garden with dad for a while.....

These are all things I'm trying to do. They are little things, but I know they mean a lot.

1 comment:

  1. i love this! i'm brand new to three and, whoa, it's kind of a circus for a newbie.